By Anthony Sheridan
The Public Accounts Committee (PAC) is, and has always been, a powerless talking shop, this is no accident. Those who wield the real power in our country would never allow any entity, political or regulatory, to put their interests at risk.
From time to time, however, some members of PAC get a bit uppity, start to stray beyond the limits of the strict rules under which they are forced to operate.
Fianna Fail TD John McGuinness, Sinn Fein TD Mary Lou McDonald and Independent TD Shane Ross are recent examples of this dangerous tendency to actually make the corrupt accountable.
But those who wield real power in our country can rest easy again under the ‘leadership’ of the new chairman of PAC, Fianna Fail TD, Sean Fleming.
Fleming is obediently conforming to strict new rules designed to put his committee firmly back in its box.
Satire is sometimes the only way of responding to such shameful acquiescence.
Here’s my take:
Sean Fleming TD is the new sheriff in town and he’s a mean dude who means business. Sean the Sheriff is the new chairman of the Public Accounts Committee (PAC) so watch out all you corrupt bankers, property developers, crooked police officers and misspending civil servants, Sean the Sherriff is a comin ta get ya.
As a member of Fianna Fail, the most notorious criminal gang in the Wild West of Irish politics, Sean will have the lowdown on any critter that tries to put one over on the good folks of his town.
Yessiree, Sean the Sheriff ain’t gonna take any prisoners when it comes to dealing with nasty varmints who try to infect his town with corruption, fraud and gombeenism.
In this report Sean the Sheriff is described as:
An experienced, cautious and eagle-eyed (sheriff) politician.
Will he have any problems speaking up, he was asked.
I guarantee that won’t be a problem. There will be no punches pulled at all.
And to make the point Sean the Sheriff pulled out his massive six-gun and pointed it in a threatening but most impressive manner.
But wait, that’s not a six-gun, it’s…it’s…a water pistol.
Yes, I know, said Sean the Sheriff, despondently. I don’t really have any (fire) power at all; it’s just a game of make-believe cowboys.
But what about the previous sheriff, John McGuiness? Didn’t he have a cap gun, which, while totally ineffective, did make a bang?
Yes, but he banged (his mouth off) too much which annoyed some very important people so they’ve taken it away and replaced it with this totally silent water pistol.
But surely they should be giving PAC more powers, not less, to fight the ruthlessly corrupt who are armed with such lethal weapons as corrupt politicians, bent lawyers and crooked accountants?
Sean the Sheriff could only reply, as instructed, with this incredibly stupid statement.
Use the powers you have to the best ability without having to use the powers you don’t have.
And so, as Sean the sheriff reloads his water pistol, the townspeople continue to cower in fear of the corrupt, still waiting for a sheriff with a real gun to ride into town and chase out the baddies.
It could be a long wait.
All PAC members